I love one day to have my own apartment but right now my money goes on my brother, then my mum. OMG I bought him a tiny thobe the other day and told him to wear it on Fridays. He will look so cute in it!!! I can't wait to see him again. So, until I get my own yard I live in mixed accommodation with randoms. I don't mind it and it's never dullard. But atm we have got the weirdest house ever!!!
This bloke moves in downstairs. He's about 50, bit of a stoop, hyperactive and weird. Not weird with some originality, not creepy weird because he seems rli sweet, but just, talks-to-himself-out-loud, weird and, random noises, weird and, a bit obsessive, weird. What is more weird is that the other people who live in the house have checked themselves since hearing him and so they went completely silent when using the communal areas in the house, including me!!! Too funny.
Sometimes you don't even notice what you do that's weird until you hear it or see it in other people, then you're like DAM STOP already, lulz.
The other residents are equally extreme. There's the 5XL, 40 something lady, who lives next door to me. She is a major control freik and laughs even when there's nothing funny to laugh at. There's the bloke upstairs who is clumsy and uncoordinated, he's a proper aerosol and me and him argue so much but he always starts with me, never the other way round and I only respond because after about 15 seconds he runs out of witty things to say and I don't, which makes him total vexed. Idiot.
There's the Czech man who lives upstairs about 50 who sounds like a German and snores OMG BARE loud, the other guy upstairs is about 25 and he's like a girl, and he exaggerates so much about everything. Apparently he's got every rare condition there is. Then there is another actual girl downstairs near me and no one ever sees her hardly at all. She's oriental and rli sweet but total shy.
Then there's me ^_______________^ Nothing to see here, move along, ha!
Friday 23 August 2013
Wednesday 21 August 2013
Godfrey's Blooming Marvellous!
The Sun style headline to kick off Godfrey the Great and his latest vacuous comments ( LBC ), as that's about the same level his opinions on just about everything is at.
Don't get me wrong, I love that the bloke exists so freiken much and would defend his right to make a arse of himself every day.
According to him, feminists are "shrill, bored, middle class women of a certain physical genre".
I actually don't like the feminists I have come across in life so, this only reads like a yawny misogynistic generalisation for me.
And their male supporters are "slightly effete, politically correct chaps who get sand kicked in their face in the beach".
haha... I don't think mrjamesob is effete, he's the only feminist supporter I know of. I'm undecided about the rest.
He reckons he's a alpha male who wouldn't be at the birth of his own baby, which is a weird example to give up of a alpha male. That tells me more that he isn't one.
His comments about female car drivers are jokes!!! Like someone's skill level at any one thing is down to their gender, lulz
If I ever see Godfrey at traffic lights when I'm in my car, I would show him my amazing hand break spin, burn some rubber and leave grandad in smoke thinking up his next incoherent comments about the 'irresponsible youth of today'.
Friday 16 August 2013
Non Muslims: Brainwashed about Hijab
How can a non-Muslim even hope to understand about hijab (modesty covering), when they are brainwashed by the media already that a woman dresses in this way because she is oppressed.
I am an English girl, reasonably confident (depending on the circumstances), opinionated with a healthy self-esteem. I'm not fugly. I'm above average looking and a size 10 dress. I'm also a revert (convert) to Islam. The reason I mention my physical appearance is that some people think it's only fugly girls who revert to Islam because they can get a husband easier as he can't see her. Lame, but I heard that one before.
Ok, oppression. No-one is oppressing me. I have a quick enough tongue and some skillful kickboxing moves and if someone tried to oppress me, I'd use them both. I don't have a Muslim family, I didn't grow up in a Muslim community and I don't have a Muslim husband telling me to wear modest clothes or he'll smack me with miswak.
I am Muslim because Islam is the haqq (truth). I wear hijab firstly because it is written in The Qur'an and secondly because I choose to. Some Muslim women choose not to and that's their business.
I grew up in a western culture that tells me I have liberty and choice and yet all of the women, with various amounts of their body on show, don't look to me like they are utilising that choice. They look like they are brainwashed by a over-sexualised culture. Ok, so I am using my choice, but the minute I take that choice opposite to the mainstream culture I live in, I am now considered oppressed. Too funny! But sad as well.
The reason women in Islam are instructed by Allah (subhana wa ta 3la), to cover, is not to keep us down and oppress us, anyone with even a elementary understanding of Islam will know that is emotive rubbish that fits with the current anti-Islamic climate. The reason we cover is first because it's an act of worship to Allah and second because our bodies are only for our husbands to see. A gift for him alone. Since I covered mine, I feel so nice not having blokes looking at me like...that way. I know not every bloke looks that way at women but a lot do and I get how difficult it is not to look for some blokes. And some women don't even mind a bloke looking because he's just appreciating her nice looks and nothing more than that. I get it! I really do.
I had mates in the coffee shop I worked at say that I looked nice or that I was beautiful, well one said I looked beautiful and I didn't think he was a perv or anything but just complimentary. The thing is though, it's better this way, I feel better this way as a woman.
When I talk to a bloke now, my sexuality doesn't come into it. It's just a straight communication and I feel respected for just being a human being on the planet and not a sexual object to look at, even if only to admire in a polite way.
I am an English girl, reasonably confident (depending on the circumstances), opinionated with a healthy self-esteem. I'm not fugly. I'm above average looking and a size 10 dress. I'm also a revert (convert) to Islam. The reason I mention my physical appearance is that some people think it's only fugly girls who revert to Islam because they can get a husband easier as he can't see her. Lame, but I heard that one before.
Ok, oppression. No-one is oppressing me. I have a quick enough tongue and some skillful kickboxing moves and if someone tried to oppress me, I'd use them both. I don't have a Muslim family, I didn't grow up in a Muslim community and I don't have a Muslim husband telling me to wear modest clothes or he'll smack me with miswak.
I am Muslim because Islam is the haqq (truth). I wear hijab firstly because it is written in The Qur'an and secondly because I choose to. Some Muslim women choose not to and that's their business.
I grew up in a western culture that tells me I have liberty and choice and yet all of the women, with various amounts of their body on show, don't look to me like they are utilising that choice. They look like they are brainwashed by a over-sexualised culture. Ok, so I am using my choice, but the minute I take that choice opposite to the mainstream culture I live in, I am now considered oppressed. Too funny! But sad as well.
The reason women in Islam are instructed by Allah (subhana wa ta 3la), to cover, is not to keep us down and oppress us, anyone with even a elementary understanding of Islam will know that is emotive rubbish that fits with the current anti-Islamic climate. The reason we cover is first because it's an act of worship to Allah and second because our bodies are only for our husbands to see. A gift for him alone. Since I covered mine, I feel so nice not having blokes looking at me like...that way. I know not every bloke looks that way at women but a lot do and I get how difficult it is not to look for some blokes. And some women don't even mind a bloke looking because he's just appreciating her nice looks and nothing more than that. I get it! I really do.
I had mates in the coffee shop I worked at say that I looked nice or that I was beautiful, well one said I looked beautiful and I didn't think he was a perv or anything but just complimentary. The thing is though, it's better this way, I feel better this way as a woman.
When I talk to a bloke now, my sexuality doesn't come into it. It's just a straight communication and I feel respected for just being a human being on the planet and not a sexual object to look at, even if only to admire in a polite way.
Thursday 15 August 2013
Care Workers Do Care
I want to say something about care homes because I work in one and I feel that the care workers have come under a lot of attack because of some really bad and abusive carers, the rest get slated as well.
Contrary to popular belief about care workers
I personally am not working in a care home because I am not skilled enough to do anything else. I could easily earn a lot more money than 6:70 per hour, if I had taken a job in retail. I actual passed-up a job in John Lewis for the job I have now....and also I left a good job in a coffee shop to take the job I am in now. Reason is, I know the state of some of the care homes and I made an intelligent and informed decision to go work there. That's the same for a lot of people who could earn more somewhere else where the manual work is less back-breaking and you don't get punched in the face or spit at on a regular basis or pooed on or vomited on either. Just customers buying stuff off you. Nice! But for me, unsatisfying and total massboredom.
You might think that a lot of the staff are mingers who don't care about their job and who can't be arsed to care for the residents properly. There are some like that, yea sure, there is in any job, some people who do stuff that is total inapropriate so that they shouldn't even be there working BUT the majority of staff in any care home, cares about their people.
Contrary to popular belief about care workers
I personally am not working in a care home because I am not skilled enough to do anything else. I could easily earn a lot more money than 6:70 per hour, if I had taken a job in retail. I actual passed-up a job in John Lewis for the job I have now....and also I left a good job in a coffee shop to take the job I am in now. Reason is, I know the state of some of the care homes and I made an intelligent and informed decision to go work there. That's the same for a lot of people who could earn more somewhere else where the manual work is less back-breaking and you don't get punched in the face or spit at on a regular basis or pooed on or vomited on either. Just customers buying stuff off you. Nice! But for me, unsatisfying and total massboredom.
You might think that a lot of the staff are mingers who don't care about their job and who can't be arsed to care for the residents properly. There are some like that, yea sure, there is in any job, some people who do stuff that is total inapropriate so that they shouldn't even be there working BUT the majority of staff in any care home, cares about their people.
Friday 9 August 2013
Mandatory kickboxing in schools
I started back kick boxing again. I can hardly expect any future girl kids of mine to be into sport/fitness/self-defense, if I get slack in it. Also I like it, even though I have no power lulz. That's what my last instructor used to say to me, great skill, no power. This new instructor is a woman so we see what she thinks. I only get power when I am proper angry and I can't just pretend to be angry when I'm in class. Anyway it's more about skill not power.
Girls must be able to effectively defend themself physically. Even without formal training I learned to be physically confident and not to be scared of any pain the other person could cause me and to do whatever I could to defend myself. I think all girl kids should be taught this ability to a serious trained competant level, to even the balance of power if they come across some munt in life that means to do them serious body harm, and it has to be taught in schools mandatory or not every girl would learn. I hate mandatory govt stuff but this is too important it has to be this way.
I like the idea of a tonne of black ops girls out in the world where most can hurt you but some can use deadly force if they need to. Also, kick boxing is good for your bum and thighs.
Girls must be able to effectively defend themself physically. Even without formal training I learned to be physically confident and not to be scared of any pain the other person could cause me and to do whatever I could to defend myself. I think all girl kids should be taught this ability to a serious trained competant level, to even the balance of power if they come across some munt in life that means to do them serious body harm, and it has to be taught in schools mandatory or not every girl would learn. I hate mandatory govt stuff but this is too important it has to be this way.
I like the idea of a tonne of black ops girls out in the world where most can hurt you but some can use deadly force if they need to. Also, kick boxing is good for your bum and thighs.
Tuesday 6 August 2013
What is Islam in my culture?
I am English. I was born in England, I look English, I am culturally English and ethnically English. I like being English. I don't like being British so much but that's another issue. I am Muslim as well, trying to separate culture from Islam because, some of the clothing, ways of eating and other practices are def only cultural.
There are things in my religion that are commands I must do, such as cover my skin and head and not to show any outline shape of my body when I'm outside. There's things in Islam that are sunnah, (what the Prophet, salalahu 3lehi wa silum, did) and so they are recommended strongly, like eating with your fingers rather than knifes, spoons and forks and for a man, marrying more than one woman. I want to be able to obey the root of the command or sunnah, and leave out the cultural weight that is rli alien to me.
I don't mean modernising Islam or updating it. Islam doesn't need updating. It is the truth and so it will not change. To me, it seems that what society calls 'modern muslims' are just weak Muslims who choose to be slack in their practices like prayers and alcohol. Then non-Muslims regard them as being more progressive and to some extent, more acceptable. That's not what I'm talking about for me. I don't need to be accepted by a sub-culture that is against Allah.
I want to be a strict, good, hanbali Muslim but still keep my western Englishness and not feel like I am changing ethnicity and traditional culture. Like the black abaya that I wear and niqab. I don't like it. I have wore it for three months now and it needs to be different for me. The command to cover youself as a woman is non-negotiable but the other part about not making yourself stick out in society and causing attention to yourself is the part I want to change. I feel like when I am all in black I do really stick out and I also can back up with evidence that I get more comments both righteous and bitching ones, than I do when I blend in to society more. It might also be because I go around in black total covered without a male family escort with me, because I don't have one, but I have to live!
I think I would feel better and remain obedient to Allah, subhana wa ta 3la, if I dressed more normal and still kept strict hijab, than if I dressed all in black like Muslims do in other cultures. It's really hard for a western revert because, other Muslims make out like it's all Islam but it's not.
There are things in my religion that are commands I must do, such as cover my skin and head and not to show any outline shape of my body when I'm outside. There's things in Islam that are sunnah, (what the Prophet, salalahu 3lehi wa silum, did) and so they are recommended strongly, like eating with your fingers rather than knifes, spoons and forks and for a man, marrying more than one woman. I want to be able to obey the root of the command or sunnah, and leave out the cultural weight that is rli alien to me.
I don't mean modernising Islam or updating it. Islam doesn't need updating. It is the truth and so it will not change. To me, it seems that what society calls 'modern muslims' are just weak Muslims who choose to be slack in their practices like prayers and alcohol. Then non-Muslims regard them as being more progressive and to some extent, more acceptable. That's not what I'm talking about for me. I don't need to be accepted by a sub-culture that is against Allah.
I want to be a strict, good, hanbali Muslim but still keep my western Englishness and not feel like I am changing ethnicity and traditional culture. Like the black abaya that I wear and niqab. I don't like it. I have wore it for three months now and it needs to be different for me. The command to cover youself as a woman is non-negotiable but the other part about not making yourself stick out in society and causing attention to yourself is the part I want to change. I feel like when I am all in black I do really stick out and I also can back up with evidence that I get more comments both righteous and bitching ones, than I do when I blend in to society more. It might also be because I go around in black total covered without a male family escort with me, because I don't have one, but I have to live!
I think I would feel better and remain obedient to Allah, subhana wa ta 3la, if I dressed more normal and still kept strict hijab, than if I dressed all in black like Muslims do in other cultures. It's really hard for a western revert because, other Muslims make out like it's all Islam but it's not.
Friday 2 August 2013
A World With No Music
I recently said my shahada into Islam and I am having a problem about music being haram.
I didn't have a problem with it initially because I was probably a bit bored with what I was listening to anyway and so I didn't miss not having music in my life. Then I went to see a choir with some old bloke I know. He lost his wife and didn't go out at all so I said I would go with him as I never have seen a choir before.
Omg the noise they can make when they sing together is amazing to feel it in your body as they sing. It literally vibrates in your whole body and the quality of the sound was sick!! The arrangement of the music I loved that, the different parts each group was singing that all blended together and also the depth of overall sound with the lightness and heaviness of their tones. I friken loved it!
But then I know that music is haram. If people have lovely voices then use them to recite the Qur'an. That is what Islam says which I agree, is a beautiful thing.
How can all this creativity be so wrong? I don't get that.
Music can be used for destructive purposes sure but it can also be used for such good. Even in my work at a residential care home, the experts suggest we should sing to the residents as we feed them or dress them, as it is something that connects to people even when they have dementia. I can see that it total helps. This one lady in bed, can't swallow much, def on her way out of this world, actual smiles when I sing something even like a baby rhyme to her or some old retro song. She squeezes my hand and cracks a smile.
I loved that feeling I had when I listened to the choir. It was immediate and fresh. I loved the creativity of it and that, even though its not the stuff I would listen to regular, because it was such a good example of a choir, I could appreciate the same quality in that, as I would any other music that I actual liked. It just moved my deepest self; it was like being lost in some experience with no one else present.
Maybe that's why it's haram, because of the power music has, to affect us.
I didn't have a problem with it initially because I was probably a bit bored with what I was listening to anyway and so I didn't miss not having music in my life. Then I went to see a choir with some old bloke I know. He lost his wife and didn't go out at all so I said I would go with him as I never have seen a choir before.
Omg the noise they can make when they sing together is amazing to feel it in your body as they sing. It literally vibrates in your whole body and the quality of the sound was sick!! The arrangement of the music I loved that, the different parts each group was singing that all blended together and also the depth of overall sound with the lightness and heaviness of their tones. I friken loved it!
But then I know that music is haram. If people have lovely voices then use them to recite the Qur'an. That is what Islam says which I agree, is a beautiful thing.
How can all this creativity be so wrong? I don't get that.
Music can be used for destructive purposes sure but it can also be used for such good. Even in my work at a residential care home, the experts suggest we should sing to the residents as we feed them or dress them, as it is something that connects to people even when they have dementia. I can see that it total helps. This one lady in bed, can't swallow much, def on her way out of this world, actual smiles when I sing something even like a baby rhyme to her or some old retro song. She squeezes my hand and cracks a smile.
I loved that feeling I had when I listened to the choir. It was immediate and fresh. I loved the creativity of it and that, even though its not the stuff I would listen to regular, because it was such a good example of a choir, I could appreciate the same quality in that, as I would any other music that I actual liked. It just moved my deepest self; it was like being lost in some experience with no one else present.
Maybe that's why it's haram, because of the power music has, to affect us.
Thursday 1 August 2013
Daniel Pelka
Even with a normal good happy day, I have still been sad way deep in my heart about this kid..
What could or should have been done? Makes me nauseus even to discuss this stuff again and again but we have to because each time we do, we get closer to the answers to difficult questions.
I'm less interested in what agency is to blame because I am too stuck on what I would do if I knew that family or one like it. The answer to that question is way more productive to me than pointing the finger at some person 'out there' whose job I don't know nothing about. Unless of course they were proven to be blatantly negligent in their job, then that's a total diffrent thing.
My mum is an addict and she used to lie way too good to the social workers and key workers about me. I wasn't abused though, just neglected by her because of her addiction. Luckily, two fractured arms and concussion from her 'bf' made my situation too obvious for any doubts and I was taken into the system at five, mostly down to a neighbour who made a report and the school stepping in.
I refuse to believe that people don't care enough. I think most people do care and are trying to do their best in circumstances where you're slated when you jump too quick on a innocent family and the same if you act too slow on a guilty one. The people who did this sick stuff to Daniel are devious, manipulative and very determined.
What could or should have been done? Makes me nauseus even to discuss this stuff again and again but we have to because each time we do, we get closer to the answers to difficult questions.
I'm less interested in what agency is to blame because I am too stuck on what I would do if I knew that family or one like it. The answer to that question is way more productive to me than pointing the finger at some person 'out there' whose job I don't know nothing about. Unless of course they were proven to be blatantly negligent in their job, then that's a total diffrent thing.
My mum is an addict and she used to lie way too good to the social workers and key workers about me. I wasn't abused though, just neglected by her because of her addiction. Luckily, two fractured arms and concussion from her 'bf' made my situation too obvious for any doubts and I was taken into the system at five, mostly down to a neighbour who made a report and the school stepping in.
I refuse to believe that people don't care enough. I think most people do care and are trying to do their best in circumstances where you're slated when you jump too quick on a innocent family and the same if you act too slow on a guilty one. The people who did this sick stuff to Daniel are devious, manipulative and very determined.
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